I have so many mixed emotions and thoughts right now - I just got back from my first full day of 'real' work :)
Not that teaching piano isn't 'real' - it makes better money than any 'real' job I've ever had, but it's easier in a lot of ways. When I teach piano, my daughter stays at home with me. I usually find a babysitter to watch her while I'm teaching, but it can be anyone approximately 9 years old and older who enjoys playing with a baby basically unsupervised. And I'm always here in case of an emergency, or in case Clara just wants to come cuddle with me!
This morning, my husband and I dropped my daughter off at a friends' house (thank God I have incredible friends willing and ready to babysit, and I don't have to find a daycare and leave her with people I don't know!) and left her there for her first FULL DAY of 'day care'.
Then, I went to work! In a location that isn't my living room!
My new job - just for the summer, so I will be back to teaching piano in fall - is working as an administrative assistant in a church that happens to be located only a few blocks from my home. My first day of 'training' was pretty much un-daunting, and after asking my boss if there was a piano I could make use of during my extra long lunch breaks, he said I was welcome to any of them - even the GRAND PIANO IN THE SANCTUARY!!! I just about cried and hugged him right there.
I'm excited about a few things: biking or walking to work - at least a little bit of forced exercise daily, getting out of my house which seriously doesn't happen often enough for me, and feeling a little bit more 'professional' is an attractive concept also - it also helps that I have an excuse to buy nicer clothes! :)
I'm also sad about a lot of things, though. I was so looking forward to spending my summer days hanging out in the yard with my little girl - who is old enough to play in the sand and the pool - and now I will miss many of those days. I will mostly no longer be a SAHM, which is a title I really was proud of... It will also be a bit more difficult now to motivate myself to cook and clean after a day of work - hopefully the house won't get as messy if we're not in it?
That's probably wishful thinking...